Friday, August 31, 2007

新加坡故事... A Singapore Story #1

阿达愣愣地望着躺在血泊中的阿萍。血一滴滴地从他手中的小刀滴到地上。

“妈的!我怎么把她杀了?” 阿达慌慌张张地跑出了阿萍的家,然后一直跑一直跑地,不知跑了多久之后,他竟然在路上看到了一群警察!更令他慌张的是,有个警员伸出手拦截了他!

“警察临检!你是在跑步吗?” 警员严肃地问道。
“呃... 是的,我在跑步。” 阿达很努力地保持镇定。
“你身上的Tshirt...” 警员在他身上打量着。阿达起了一身的鸡皮疙瘩。他突然想到,难道他的身上沾上了阿萍的血?

“为什么你穿粉红色的Tshirt? 你是同志吗?” 警员瞪着阿达。
“同志?”
“是啊!你和别的同志一起穿着粉红色的Tshirt跑步吗?”
“没有!而且我不是同志!我爱女生!”

阿达摸了一下他头上的冷汗。

“不是同志... 那你身上有槌子...”
“没有!我身上没有槌子也没有刀子!” 阿达急忙打断了警员的话。
“别紧张!我是问你,你身上有槌子图案的标志的东西吗?譬如说传单之类的” 
“槌子图案的标志?我不知道你在讲什么。”
“我是说,你和别的政党的党员一起跑步吗?还是你正要去和他们一起踏脚车?” 警员不耐烦地问道。
“没有!而且我...我...我支持执政党!” 阿达急忙撒了个谎,希望这个警员别再问他问题了。
“哦...那你可以走了。”

阿达擦了一下他头上的冷汗,然后赶紧用最快的速度跑离现场。当他跑到一个没人的角落后,阿达偷偷地把那把一直放在口袋里,沾满了阿萍的血的小刀丢了。

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Singapore Scenes ... Waterfest 2007

25th August 2007 - Waterfest 2007
汪洋中的一条龙舟

25th August 2007 - Waterfest 2007
“喂!先生你坐错位了!”“是啊!你坐了我的位子了啦!”

25th August 2007 - Waterfest 2007
就当每个都忙着划的时候,他们怎么把桨举起来了?

25th August 2007 - Waterfest 2007
哎呀!赌场还没起好啦!我们太早到了!

25th August 2007 - Waterfest 2007
龙舟赛开始咯~

25th August 2007 - Waterfest 2007
咦?他们去哪里啊?比赛的起点换了吗?

25th August 2007 - Waterfest 2007
“呼~呼~ 我是你老爸~”

25th August 2007 - Waterfest 2007
不止高速公路上的车拥挤,连海上的帆船也挤在一起了!

Monday, August 27, 2007

Mandarin cool... so are Japanese and Korean! #5

Lesson 5 - At the convenient store

Hanyu Pinyin is used as the basic form of pronounciation here, unless otherwise stated. For those not familiar in Hanyu Pinyin (were you sleeping in your Primary school chinese lessons?), these are some illustrations:

a = a as in art
i = i as in ink
u = oo as in cool
e = a as in air
o = aw as in paw
ao = ou as in ouch
an = un as in until




John: Is there telephone card here?
Xiao Ming: 这里有电话卡吗? (zhe li you dian hua ka ma)
Nakamura: ここに テレフォン カヅ ありますか? (ko ko ni te-re-fon ka-du a ri ma-su ka)
Yong Su: 여기 전화카드 있어요? (yo gi chon hu-a ka-du i so yo)

John: Is there XYZ here?
Xiao Ming: 这里有 ... 吗? (zhe li you ... ma)
Nakamura: ここに ... ありますか? (ko ko ni ... a ri ma-su ka)
Yong Su: 여기 ... 있어요? (yo gi ... i so yo)

John: Sorry. There isn't any here.
Xiao Ming: 对不起。 这里没有 (dui bu qi. zhe li mei you)
Nakamura: すみません. ここに ありますせん (su mi ma sen. ko ko ni a ri ma sen)
Yong Su: 미안합니다. 여기 없어요 (mi an ham ni da. yo gi op so yo)

John: Yes. Yes. There is.
Xiao Ming: 是的。 有的 (shi de. you de)
Nakamura: はい. あります (hai. a ri ma-su)
Yong Su: 네. 잇어요 (ne. i so yo)

John: How much?
Xiao Ming: 多少钱? (duo shao qian)
Nakamura: いくらですか? (i ku ra de-su ka)
Yong Su: 얼마예요? (o-r ma ye yo)


Disclaimer: I'm not a Chinese/Japanese/Korean teacher and I'm only sharing what I know. These lessons are not part of any formal text books and you don't get any certifications from learning them. You will not become an expert from these lessons because I'm not any expert myself. The only thing I can guarantee is that your Chinese/Japanese/Korean friends can finally understand what you're trying to say.

Sunday, August 26, 2007

Let's celebrate odex's screwup!

Odex had "no right of civil action" against illegal downloaders because it was just a sub-licensee — not the copyright owner or exclusive licensee — for most of the anime titles sold here.

District Judge Earnest Lau — who on Thursday ordered Odex to pay legal costs of more than $7,000 — expressed unease over the hasty manner in which Odex tried to go after some 1,000 PacNet subscribers. In particular, he was unconvinced of the investigation method it used to uncover the IP addresses and pinpoint the alleged wrongdoers.


Enjoy more reading at TODAYonline

And here's some latest anime for celebration of some idiot's wishfull thinking crashed! If you've not watched any anime online, you really don't know what you're missing! :)

Naruto #178

Link to Naruto 178

Bleach #137

Link to Bleach 137

One Piece #320

Link to One Piece 320

Oh... by the way, time to switch OUT of Singnet... :)

Friday, August 24, 2007

Mandarin cool... so are Japanese and Korean! #4

Lesson 4 - At the hotel

Hanyu Pinyin is used as the basic form of pronounciation here, unless otherwise stated. For those not familiar in Hanyu Pinyin (were you sleeping in your Primary school chinese lessons?), these are some illustrations:

a = a as in art
i = i as in ink
u = oo as in cool
e = a as in air
o = aw as in paw
ao = ou as in ouch
an = un as in until




John: Please help me to check in.
Xiao Ming: 请帮我办理入住手续。 (qing bang wo ban li ru zhu shou xu)
Nakamura: チエクイン ください (chi-e-ku-in ku da sai)
Yong Su: 체크인 해 주세요 (che-ku-in he chu se yo)

John: My name is John
Xiao Ming: 我叫做小明 (wo jiao zuo xiao ming)
Nakamura: 私は中村です (wa ta shi wa nakamura de-su)
Yong Su: 저는 영수 예요 (cho nun yong su ye yo)

Hotel staff: Please hold on a while
Hotel staff: 请稍等一下 (qing shao deng yi xia)
Hotel staff: しょしょお待ちください (sh-yo sh-yo o ma chi ku da sai)
Hotel staff: 잠깐만 기다리세요 (cham gan man ki da ri se yo)

Hotel staff: This is the room key
Hotel staff: 这是房间的钥匙 (zhe shi fang jian de yao shi)
Hotel staff: これは部屋のかぎです (ko re wa he ya no ka gi de-su)
Hotel staff: 이거 방외열쇠 예요 (i go pang ui yor sui ye yo)


Disclaimer: I'm not a Chinese/Japanese/Korean teacher and I'm only sharing what I know. These lessons are not part of any formal text books and you don't get any certifications from learning them. You will not become an expert from these lessons because I'm not any expert myself. The only thing I can guarantee is that your Chinese/Japanese/Korean friend can finally understand what you're trying to say.

Thursday, August 23, 2007

天冷就回来... If there're seasons


如果你和我一样是听梁文福的歌长大的,你一定要看《天冷就回来》!从一个尝试忘掉过去的恋情去接受未来的恋情的男生,从一群在纽约生活的新加坡人,你会听到一首首熟悉的歌曲。那些你以为已经忘记了,却突然可以跟着演员们一起哼唱的歌曲。在剧里,你可以再次听到《担心》,《新加坡派》,《喜欢你》,甚至《历史考试前夕》!

故事的大纲是...当爱人小静去世后,阿乐就一个人背包去了纽约,打算追求自己的音乐理想。在纽约的街上他遇到了另一个新加坡人阿强,然后又在帮阿强送外卖时遇到了Rose。之后,阿乐和一群新加坡人一起在一个新加坡老板的餐厅里干活,一起玩音乐,而Rose也渐渐地爱上了他...

上官方网站了解多一点吧!

听一听主题曲《天冷就回来》!

去买票自己看看吧!

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

救救林厝港... Help save Lim Chu Kang

政府说要找个地方储存些花岗岩。就这样,林厝港那一带就出现了一个花岗岩储藏场。不错,就在新加坡所剩无几的农业地区。为了防止花岗岩污染到附近的农地,有关当局就建了高高的围墙。不错,他们似乎认为花岗岩的尘土绝对不会往高处飞。

有关当局还说他们已经确保环境不会受到污染了。不错,他们觉得只要开了一条专为装运花岗岩的道路,只要沟渠能把污染的雨水都冲走,只要周末和公共假期不装运花岗岩,环境就没有理由会受到污染。

这一带的两百多个农场会把农作物卖到本地各大超市,然后我们就把这些蔬菜水果买回家吃。不知各位是不是也和有关当局一样觉得这一带真的是一个很适合储存花岗岩的地点?

当然,如果小至百年老树,大至历史悠久的国家图书馆都得为了“发展”这个目的而让步的话,两百多个小农场又算得了什么?


Over 80 acres of arable land, originally earmarked for agricultural purposes, has been bulldozed to become a granite stockpile site.

Help save what little countryside that's left. It took local farmers years to create this sustainable countryside in Lim Chu Kang, where nature and nurture happily co-exist. It only took the Govt. agencies 2 months to destroy it.

Help save Singapore's countryside by signing the petition!

Singapore Scenes ... Singapore River

7th July 2007 - Singapore River
桥上的一盏灯已经在多少个夜晚里为多少个路人照亮了他们的道路?

7th July 2007 - Singapore River
把高楼大厦的压迫感和河边餐馆的喧闹都抛到脑后,让小船慢慢地带你到新加坡河宁静的那一处吧!

7th July 2007 - Singapore River
尽管已经过了139年,这座桥上的漆还是那么的洁白。我们就是应该如此的保留历史,而不是把它们拆毁了!

7th July 2007 - Singapore River
全赖这些清洁工人,新加坡河才能如此的干净,不像世界上其他的一些河川景点又脏又臭的...

7th July 2007 - Singapore River
“这是铜做的吗?怎么那么像朱古力?”

7th July 2007 - Singapore River
这一栋栋的银行似乎是在争着说“嘿!还是我比较高啦!”

Monday, August 20, 2007

无聊的新加坡式笑话... Boliao Singaporean Jokes #4

这一期,我要写的不是joke,而是fact。不过这些fact似乎只可能会在新加坡发生,如果在别的国家,应该会发生游行,示威,抗议吧?因为对他们来说,这些真的是笑话...

最近新加坡这个小岛发生了如此的搞笑事件:

Sunday, August 19, 2007

Singapore Scenes ... Raffles Place

7th July 2007 - Raffles Place
高高的UOB在众银行中最突出了

7th July 2007 - Raffles Place
知道为什么这头石狮子的牙齿是平的吗?因为它只吃乳酪啊!

7th July 2007 - Raffles Place
这一整排的灯很有“花样年华”的感觉哦...

7th July 2007 - Raffles Place
一盆盆的水花啦啦地流下来,也让酒店旁这条小巷带点生气

7th July 2007 - Raffles Place
晚上的Fullerton Hotel闪耀动人,比起白天的时候华丽多了!

7th July 2007 - Raffles Place
酒店周围的椰树为Fullerton Hotel增添了些热带的感觉

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

What if Singapore were a person?

SingaporePersonified



“小鬼,你这里环境不错哦!有老爸老妈疼,还有一个随传随到的菲佣!看你拽的样子!”



SingaporePersonified



“恭喜你终于毕业了!为了你这个大学生,你老爸还真花了不少钱,老妈也多了不少皱纹啊!”


SingaporePersonified
“嘿嘿~ 在这里怎么说还是读IT的比较吃香吧!哎呀呀~ 你当初又没拿到政府奖学金,你读的那间又不是叫NUS还是NTU的,就别再想着做轻松的政府工啦!可以挤进这间MNC不是更赞吗?好好的在这里拼吧!”

SingaporePersonified



“好耶~ 你到底还是赢得美人归咯!接下来你们还得去HDB申请组屋哦!对了,明年的酒席还是先订吧,不然会没位哦!”

SingaporePersonified



“Bonjour! 你们这一趟欧洲之旅还玩得开心吧?对嘛~ 每天这么辛苦地工作,也应该出出国开心一下嘛!”


SingaporePersonified
“안녕하세요!哇~ 在韩国滑雪很棒吧!数一数你也去过世界上好几个国家玩啰!可是都已经这么多年了,也该停下脚步来生个小孩了吧?听说如果你们这些年轻人再不生多点小孩,政府可能要鼓励聪明的妇女们当未婚妈妈哦!”

SingaporePersonified
“喂!不是才刚花了一大笔钱在麦当劳替他庆祝生日吗?怎么又买玩具给他?家里不是有Gameboy和PS3吗?怎么还买Wii?其实他要的是你的关怀,是要你陪他啊!你们夫妻俩整天就懂得工作工作的,只给他钱,不给他爱,这怎么行!”

SingaporePersonified

“你累吗?钱都花在买房子,养车,供孩子读书了... 日常生活的费用一直在起,你的老板没打算给你加薪吗?我看你好象有点喘不过气来了呀!”

SingaporePersonified

“喂!你别停下来啊!继续做工啊!你还要捱多几年才到65岁,才可以拿你的CPF出来啊!你也千万别病倒啊!你已经没剩多少积蓄啦!”

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

无聊的新加坡式笑话... Boliao Singaporean Jokes #3

你也有这些新一代通病吗?

  • 只是要联络三个朋友,却有九个以上不同的电话号码

  • 只会用msn messenger 来跟坐在你隔壁桌的同事聊天

  • 每天都得花上至少一个钟头等公共交通

  • 和朋友聊天的话题总是以“有没有看到网上最新的...”

  • 公司里的contractors 比full-time staff 还要多,而且他们比较有可能长期做下去

  • 有一些只寄笑话,或好笑的图片和影片,却已经很久没见面和讲话的朋友

  • 星期一到五晚上都想约朋友出去吃饭喝酒,周末和公共假期时却总是想呆在家里睡觉

  • 每三个月就发现刚买不久的高科技产品已经是淘汰品了

  • 每次到food court 吃午餐都很烦恼今天要吃什么

  • 除了那些在网上炒得热的政治话题,你对国家的政治完全没有兴趣

  • 你的顶头上司的学历不一定比你高,搞不好毕业的大学还比你那间差

  • 你上youtube 看电视剧多过从电视上看

  • 看到哪里排长龙的话,你一定会参加一份,譬如说买甜圈圈

  • 在早晨,清洁工人还没开工之前,邮箱周围的地上都会布满传单

  • 你不清楚元朝时百姓们怎么团结起来推翻蒙古人,却知道今年的中秋节得尝尝新口味的月饼

Friday, August 3, 2007

各国的好玩麦当劳广告... Funny MacDonald's Ads

韩国... 和吃薯条的大只佬搭巴士


日本... 为什么进不了电梯


香港... 软硬天师送狗迎猪新年广告


台湾... 王力宏 = 黄绿红?

Thursday, August 2, 2007

Mandarin cool... so are Japanese and Korean! #3

Lesson 3 - At the airport

Hanyu Pinyin is used as the basic form of pronounciation here, unless otherwise stated. For those not familiar in Hanyu Pinyin (were you sleeping in your Primary school chinese lessons?), these are some illustrations:

a = a as in art
i = i as in ink
u = oo as in cool
e = a as in air
o = aw as in paw
ao = ou as in ouch
an = un as in until




John: Where are the luggages?
Xiao Ming: 请问行李在哪里? (qing wen xing li zai na li)
Nakamura: にもつはどちらですか? (ni mo tsu wa do chi ra de-su ka)
Yong Su: 짐 어디 에 있어요? (jim o-di e i so yo)

John: Where is the airport bus?
Xiao Ming: 请问机场巴士在哪里? (qing wen ji chang ba shi zai na li)
Nakamura: くうこうバスはどちらですか? (ku-u ko-u ba su wa do chi ra de-su ka)
Yong Su: 공항 버스 어디 에 있어요? (kong hang po su o di e i so yo)

John: Where is XYZ?
Xiao Ming: 请问XYZ在哪里? (qing wen ... zai na li)
Nakamura: XYZはどちらですか? (... wa do chi ra de-su ka)
Yong Su: XYZ 어디 에 있어요? (... o-di e i so yo)

John: Here
Xiao Ming: 这边 (zhe bian)
Nakamura: こちら (ko chi ra)
Yong Su: 여기 (yo gi)

John: There
Xiao Ming: 那边 (na bian)
Nakamura: そちら (so chi ra)
Yong Su: 저기 (cho gi)

John: Further away there
Xiao Ming: 在远一点那边 (zai yuan yi dian na bian)
Nakamura: あちら (a chi ra)
Yong Su: 거기 (ko gi)


Disclaimer: I'm not a Chinese/Japanese/Korean teacher and I'm only sharing what I know. These lessons are not part of any formal text books and you don't get any certifications from learning them. You will not become an expert from these lessons because I'm not any expert myself. The only thing I can guarantee is that your Chinese/Japanese/Korean friend can finally understand what you're trying to say.

Wednesday, August 1, 2007

相间何太急?Why can't Nicholas Lazarus be more tolerant?

最近有个叫Nicholas Lazarus 的家伙在 Young PAP Blog 里写了一篇看似很有道理但其实是妖言惑众的长篇大论。很难想象到了今时今日还存在着这等食古不化的家伙...

"With all this talk about legalizing homosexual acts, I was just pondering what would happen if such acts were indeed legalized.

Imagine men walking hand in hand with other men down Orchard Road, kissing, fondling and making out.

For that matter, imagine all that taking place on the MRT."


如果真的发生如此的景象,那就见鬼了。首先,就算政府真的把同性行为合法化,所有的男同志,女同志就会突然一起手拉着手出柜了吗?他们好像还会照顾到父母和所有爱他们的人的感受吧?而且同性行为合法化并不等于说可以在公共场所开放地做出猥亵的举动吧?那么现在一男一女的性行为是合法的吧?谁有看到整条乌节路上都是一对对的男男女女互相亲吻,抚摸吗?

"Instead of teachers dealing with boy-girl relationships, teachers would have to deal with boy-boy relationships."

男同志们不是人吗?为什么其他人可以有感情的困扰,而男同志们就没有这种权力?如果老师可以开解有感情问题的男女同学们,那为什么他不可以试着了解有烦恼的男同志同学呢?再说,这句话似乎是在推算说如果同性行为合法化的话,学校里会有无数的男同学突然有兴趣当起男同志来。这也太扯了吧?

"Then, you might have the homosexuals all over Asia descending upon Singapore to flaunt what they cannot in their own countries."

新加坡是世界上唯一一个同性行为合法化的国家吗?再说,外国的同志们会因为这个原因突然都跑来新加坡吗?那我们还干嘛建IR?世界上的男同志肯定会比赌鬼多吧?

"Leaving aside my religious views on this matter, I am against any change of law/policy on homosexuals because:

1. They threaten the social fabric of the nation. Their ways represent an alternative for which we should not accept as being mainstream."

这句话和古早的白人歧视黑人,或贵族歧视平民有什么不同?如果这家伙真的当上部长级的人物,我们可以保证他不会有种族或宗教歧视吗?

"2. They cannot procreate and thus cannot produce offspring for our nation."

如果不能或不想生育的人民都应该被歧视的话,那么要把所有不打算或不能生育的男男女女都放逐到外国去吗?那么我们需要顺便多加一条法列把堕胎废除掉,然后搞一个“未婚先孕运动”来推广推广吗?

"3. They cannot serve as soldiers because instead of serving alongside our men in green, they are more keen to sodomise them."

男同志们都是那么性饥渴的吗?按照他们对自己的形象的高要求来看,我想他们的审美观应该不至于差到见一个爱一个吧?而且举一反三的话,那我们的女军人们不都很有被男军人们侵犯的危险吗?昏~


虽然我不是男同志,但我想这样的批评对他们来说也太不公平了吧?我们没权干涉别人的性倾向,所以也不应该指责他们的选择。大家不都是新加坡人吗?难道这么一点容忍也不可以有吗?